Walk in My Shoes - Page One

     I worked at a homeless mission in Baltimore, Md. for a couple of years.  I worked in the Development Office and helped to raise money for the place and the homeless men that sought help there.  I found that I had a special place in my heart for the big fat guys that would show up.  I can call them big fat guys because I am a big fat guy myself.  It is kind of like Paris Hilton being allowed to call her friends bitches.  Anyway, finding clothes and such for big fat guys was much tougher than you might think.  You see, most big fat guys wear their clothes until they wear out regardless of their position in life.  That is because comfortable and acceptably stylish big fat guy clothing is hard to find and tends to be pricey as well.  So, when big fat guys find clothes that they can wear, they don’t just wear them, they wear them out.  The same thing goes for big fat guys shoes too.  Especially shoes.    Big fat guys put shoes to the test.  Even the best shoes do not tend to last long when it comes to big fat guys.  That being the case, seldom did we get donations to address the needs of my big fat brothers.  I was always on the lookout though and would get a little crafty at times to get the big fat guys what they needed.  I never could get them what they wanted it seemed, but I could usually find a way to get them what they needed.  Until one afternoon. I helped one guy find what he wanted and get what he needed. So did I.

     My office was usually dark.  One reason for that is that I did a lot of work on computers and it was easier to see the screen when the lights were dim.  The other reason is that I don’t like people as a rule, and if the lights were off, people were less likely to come into your office and bother you.  (That is because most people are lazy- one of the reasons that I don’t like people.  I will save that for another day though before this blog spins completely out of control.)  I relied on the light coming in from my doorway to give me the light that I needed to look like I was working while I was usually on the internet keeping updated on profootballtalk.net.  That is exactly what I was doing one afternoon when all of the sudden it got dark.  I looked up at the door to my office and saw a giant pair of sweatpants, a giant sweat shirt, and half of a face blocking my light.  That is not something that you see every day.  Even in a homeless shelter.  Before I could think of anything to say, the half of a face started talking to me.  It said, “Are you Mr. Tony?  I said, “Yes I am.  You can call me Tony. What can I do for you?”  He said, “Some people told me that I should come see you because you might be able to help me.”  I asked him, “What do you need?”  “Shoes.” he said.

    I looked at his feet and the first thing I noticed was that they were the biggest feet I had ever seen in my life.  The second thing I noticed was that this brother was wearing not one pair, but two pairs of shoes on his big fat guy feet. He had two pairs of different shoes that he had cut up, spliced into one giant shoe for each foot, and then taped back together with packing tape and duct tape to make one pair of shoes that would fit. Damn!  (Check back tomorrow for page 2)